God is our ultimate example of love, which has its highest expression in Jesus Christ. I’ve been meditating a lot on how God shows us His love, because this is how the Christian man ought to love his wife. God’s love is not a romantic love, but it is with tender mercies, lovingkindness, and caring. It’s much deeper than romance could ever get. I’m not speaking against a man doing nice things for his wife. But even if your husband is not romantic, he can show you a deep affection.
1 John 4:10 tells us: Herein is love, not that we loved God, but that he loved us, and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins.
and again, in 1 John 4:19, the Apostle tells us, We love Him because He first loved us.
God cares for His people. We are told to cast all our are upon Him, because He cares for us. We are told many times that Jesus had compassion upon the people who were afflicted and in need. It is with mercy that Jesus heals us, lifts us up, makes us whole.
Now, this is not to abnegate obedience in any way. We are commanded to be under obedience to our husbands, just as the Church is to Jesus Christ. Jesus said, if you love me, you will keep my commandments. But that obedience is born of our love for Him. We love Him because He gives us joy and peace in the Holy Ghost. What woman would not love a man who gives her joy and peace?!
Submission to our husbands should never be a burden. I don’t believe God meant it to be. Nor do I believe that a man’s love for his wife stops at protection, provision and commitment. I believe a man must show his wife the deep, caring love that Jesus has for us. Some men feel that being a man means being unemotional. They have difficulty expressing their emotions. But I submit to you that real men love deeply and can touch a woman’s soul if they choose to make the effort. Both spouses should strive to show the love that Jesus Christ has for each of us.
A marriage between a man and a woman is one of the most beautiful things God created, and each spouse should do their part unconditionally as expressed in Ephesians 5, with patience if need be, knowing that they are fulfilling the role God gave them. Marriage should be a beautiful thing, a joyous thing, not with drudgery, and not with bitterness, anger and force. People who live that kind of life are robbing themselves.