Some additional thoughts on polygamy

Two girls for every boy…

You know we’re goin’ to Surf City, ’cause it’s two to one
You know we’re goin’ to Surf City, gonna have some fun, now
Two girls for every boy

(Jan & Dean, Surf City, 1963)

Many men’s rights advocates like to say that man is inherently polygamous, that desire for more than one female is natural to him, and that women should not suppress their husband’s desire to look at other women or even want more than one.

But is that true?

If God wanted man to be polygamous, wouldn’t He have given Adam more than one helpmate?

Wouldn’t a man having more than one mate greater fulfill God’s purpose of multiplying and replenishing the earth?

Wouldn’t polygamy solve the problems of a slightly greater ratio of available females for every male?

The answers to all of these questions is no.   Polygamy is not the ideal, Godly state of man.   I say Godly because as Christians, we are to focus on the spiritual, rather the natural state of man.  Man’s nature ultimately leads to depravity.

God did not give Adam more than one help because one man and one woman was God’s ideal from the start.  He allows polygamy but it is not His ideal, and ultimately it is problematic.  Polygamists throughout the Bible had woman-trouble.

God certainly knew what it would take to replenish the Earth, so to say polygamy would’ve helped that along is to say God didn’t plan well in His creation.  Not only that, but when He had to start again from scratch (the Flood), He still maintained this model, since Noah and his three sons each had one wife.

God’s model still works in the imbalance of male-female ratio when one allows for deaths and other tragedies.

God did allow it–there were some men in the Bible who either willingly or unwillingly practiced it.  There is a though that He allowed it to compensate for men taking captives in war (these women were treated as wives generally), or when they took their brother’s wife under the Levirate Law or even, as promoted by Jacob’s wives, to solve the problem of infertility.  Solomon multiplied wives greatly, and they turned him away from God.

So, although polygamy was allowed, it is not for every culture, and it is certainly not God’s ideal.

Pamela Parizo © 2017


  1. Very interesting thread….

    You said that “Polygamy is allowed”, but I’ll take that a step further, and say, not only was it allowed, but actually endorsed by God himself, see 2Sa 12:8  “And I gave thee thy master’s house, and thy master’s wives into thy bosom”………Here we can see that God is actually the instrumental, causative cause in giving multiple wives unto King David, by using the personal pronoun I GAVE THEE

    I’m a Christian, NOT a Mormon, but I personally believe in polygamy, if not for any other reason then the fact, that 1 wife is simply not enough to meet a man’s sexual needs…..Time and time again, I have seen cases of extreme heartache, and sexual frustration caused by women’s stingy, frugal dispensing of sex to the point where other outlets for sex have been acted upon by GOOD men in otherwise healthy relationships, in order to get their sexual needs met……This could all be avoided if man had more than 1 wife

    I say this with great sadness, but as long as women are taught to belittle, and shame men in marriages for their husbands sexual needs and wanting sex all the time, polygamy will continue to look attractive to men

    Liked by 1 person

    1. If you took a look at my questions, you would see why I believe it was not God’s ideal. By saying it is God ordained, you are saying God didn’t plan well at Eden or after the flood. I do understand your frustrations. Paul did say let every man have his own wife, so I think God does believe one woman is enough. It is only that women are not taught properly to address the needs of their husbands (and their own by the way). Men do not need more than one wife….they need the wife that they have to be committed to the satisfaction of her husband’s needs. Continually the Bible tells us a man is to be satisfied with the breasts of his wife, ravished by her love (singular). A man whose wife withholds love from him should pray for her, show her scriptural proofs on the importance of intimacy (you might check out my article on that) and that her provision for his needs is meant to KEEP HIM from needing other women. I do agree with you that women who do not provide for their husbands are not doing right by him. The Bible actually calls it DEFRAUDING. Failing that the man should try to get pastoral guidance on how to tackle that. I agree with you absolutely that a man should not be ashamed of desiring intimacy with his wife. A wife is supposed to be available to him whenever he needs it. If you take a look at some of my other articles also I believe a woman owes her husband absolute submission and should obey him completely except in matters of sin.
      Peace unto you.


      1. Awesome answer!
        Thank you…..I will be sure to read your other articles 😄

        I feared the worse with your late reply, thought that my comment had been consigned to oblivion lol


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