All Men Are Not Like That

I am an overcomer of childhood sexual abuse.   My abuser was someone very close to me, and 50-plus years later I am still overcoming the effects of it, with help from God.  I recently posted #metoo as well, though I did emphasize that I am not a victim, not a survivor, but an overcomer.

I will not minimize the threat to women of sexual assault.  The threat is real.  However, as I read some of the articles coming out, I fear a general backlash against men in general.  I fear that this flood of stories coming out of Hollywood will threaten to paint all men as abusers.    I thank the Lord for good solid men, like my father, like my brother, who have worked every day of their lives and been solid citizens.  The large majority of men are like that.

We need to remember as well that there are plenty of female perpetrators out there that prey on young men and children.  I know of a couple of males personally and there may be more that suffered sexual abuse.

Unfortunately this is the problem of the left.  Everything becomes generalized.  I do hate the rape culture which is real, the manosphere which hates women and some who prey on them, but moderates need to keep things calm.  In these days it seems everyone gets polarized, white vs. black, and now male vs. female.  There is one place where we can find healing and all become undivided, all become one.  That place is with Jesus Christ.

Sin is toxic.  There are toxic males, but there are also toxic women.  Jesus offers the anti-toxin, the hyssop that cleans us out inside.  There will always be sinners, always be those who thrive on their wickedness and thrive on preying on the vulnerable, but God is our safety and defense, and that’s where we need to turn.  I nearly hesitated on posting #metoo because I didn’t want to be a part of the culture of being a victim.

In bringing out the stories of how we’ve been hurt, we need to seek healing, not just blaming.  And let’s not throw the good men to the lions while we are at it.

Pamela Parizo © 2017







  1. Amen, Pam. I too have experienced abuse and exploitation, but ironically it is the goodness of men that God has used so beautifully to bring healing to me. “All men are not like that,” indeed. I’ve lost track of all the good men in my life because there has been so many of them, men that have taught me about faith and hope and the goodness to be found in the world. Jesus Christ heals, He restores, He fixes everything. Ever the Gentleman however,we really have to reach out for Him and let Him in.

    I too was hesitant about the “Metoo,” stuff, because it only tells part of the story. Me too, yes, but the Lord and His power to redeem and heal us! I think the world always needs some moderate voices and women to speak up for men.

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